biophosphoradelecrystalluminesce:

sure everyone says theyre excited about ‘spirit week’ but the minute i awaken a few ancient spirits and raise the dead suddenly im a ‘witch’ and ‘ruining homecoming’

thursdaysangel-tuesdaysdemon:

actualdemon:

My mom will never let me live down the score I made on my 6th grade Bible studies mastery test.

image

Your URL just makes this 10,000x better

punlich:

No one is required to forgive you if you fuck up. No one is required to accept your apology. You make an apology to accept your wrongdoing, that you understand it and to announce a responsibility to improve. Not to solicit forgiveness. If forgiveness is given, great, but no one is obligated to forgive. Ever.

okcdouchebags:

xsugar-venom:

Well, you asked.

OH GOD

okcdouchebags:

xsugar-venom:

Well, you asked.

OH GOD

what's the heterosexual flag look like?
- Anonymous

lesbianvenom:

it usually looks something like this

kingtrinbago:

The Greatest Thing Since Sliced Bread

bovidae:

not changing ur url to maintain your brand recognition

did-you-kno:

In the late 1800s, paleontologists Cope and Marsh were so competitive they used bribery, theft, and slander to out-compete each other in the hunt for dinosaur fossils. Their famous rivalry became known as “The Bone Wars.” By the end of it they were both financially and socially ruined, but had discovered over 100 new species.  Source

did-you-kno:

In the late 1800s, paleontologists Cope and Marsh were so competitive they used bribery, theft, and slander to out-compete each other in the hunt for dinosaur fossils. Their famous rivalry became known as “The Bone Wars.” By the end of it they were both financially and socially ruined, but had discovered over 100 new species. Source

civem:

v0ldewhoret:

sometimes I feel like a seal is just a neutral sea lion

neutral

as in 

without an ion

everyone needs to see this post i’m not sorry

yamsy:

all these recent dystopian novels are basically the same story with a different twist it’s like

  • 16/17 yr old girl
  • white
  • long hair
  • heterosexual
  • skinny
  • there is BOY
  • maybe even TWO
  • something bad happen
  • many bad
  • become symbol for REBELLION
  • CHOSEN ONE
  • DIFFERENT
  • FALL LOVE WIT BOY
  • SAVE WLROD
  • 2 more books w/ audibly similar titles

and I feel like I should hate them for this but I CAN’T GET ENOUGH OF THESE FUCKIN BOOKS

dragontopcane:

bestlols:

It’s the little things, isn’t it?

i’m here to note that in the three seconds she took to read the message, the other woman appears to have moved from silencing her child to seducing a mildly uncomfortable man on the other side of the aisle.

dragontopcane:

bestlols:

It’s the little things, isn’t it?

i’m here to note that in the three seconds she took to read the message, the other woman appears to have moved from silencing her child to seducing a mildly uncomfortable man on the other side of the aisle.

a discussion on sexual orientation

  • me: *explaining various sexual orientations to a classmate*
  • classmate: wait, what's polyamory?
  • me: well, it's when someone has more than one intimate relationship at a time with the knowledge and consent of everyone involved.
  • professor: *overhears from front of class*
  • professor: that is d i s g u s t i n g
  • me: *defensively* um, actually, no it's--
  • professor: how DARE they put a greek prefix on a latin root like that?! What right do they have to decimate my beautiful antiquated languages?!?! GREEK AND LATIN DO NOT FRATERNIZE THIS IS LIKE THAT STUPID ROMANTIC SUBPLOT BETWEEN THAT DWARF AND THAT ELF IN THE DESOLATION OF SMAUG NO NO NO NO NO NO!!!
  • me: ....
  • me: ....
  • me: ....
  • professor: it should be polyerosy
  • PE Teacher: why are you running so slowly
  • Me: It does not matter how slow you go, as long as you do not stop - Wisdom of Confucius

luciferhasthebooty:

etnah:

hinder:

it is actually really sweet when someone stays up late to talk to you

What if they fall asleep by accident though?

then you love it even more because they stayed up even though they were dead tired just to talk to you ya doof